By MARY CARTER
Local History
Everyone loves a wedding. Today’s brides and grooms love the ability to choose something old and something new when planning their special day.
Let’s begin with their guest arrival. Traditionally, guests associated with the bride sit to the left facing the aisle, and guests of the groom to the right, as this is where the couple will end up for their vows. Aside from reserving front rows for the couple’s immediate families and attendants, guests should sit where they can see and hear comfortably, making the seating area appear as balanced as possible.
The wedding processional has seen changes over time. The officiant typically enters first, signaling that the ceremony is about to begin. The officiant can lead the processional, or enter from a side of the venue or church. Parents, if not escorting the bride or groom, enter next. Grandparents can also be included and would proceed before the parents. The groom, if part of the processional, enters with a parent, grandparent, or in the company of his best man or woman. The groom and his crew may also enter from the side of the venue or church directly after the officiant.
The wedding party proceeds next, either in pairs or singularly. The maid, matron, or man of honor appears last with the best man or woman. If ring bearers and flower ushers are included, they enter before the bride. It’s wise to have a parent in place as a beacon for those who could become distracted or overwhelmed by such a large audience.
The bride makes her appearance as she desires — alone, with one or both parents, with a sibling, a man of honor, or with her groom. If a stepfather has been a major part of a bride’s life, he can walk her halfway down the aisle to meet her birth father who then escorts her to her groom. This order can be reversed, depending on the situation. There are no rules.
The ceremony begins. How custom crafted this can be depends on the venue. An outdoor or informal ceremony can be accomplished in a matter of minutes. One held in a house of worship offers more in the way of long-standing traditions and rituals.
Now for the “I do”, or the “I will.” In years past, the question posed by the officiant would be, for example, “John, do you take Jane to be your lawfully wedded wife?” The answer that flows is, “I do.” Time and conscious thought has altered this phrase to, “John, will you take Jane for your wife?” Hence, the “I will” has become fashionable. “I do” can be seen as a claim for the day, and “I will” as one for the future. Regardless, either heart spoken vow seals the promise.
Another change over time has been the dismissal of the bride’s promise to obey her husband. Today’s couples go into a marriage with a mutual support system already in place. With thoughtful planning, the wedding ceremony marks the beginning of many years of love and happiness to come.
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